I’ve read many movie reviews (as have we all!) but I have found that since I became a mom the information that I need about a movie is never included in reviews. I have therefore decided to begin this project and review movies based on my own criteria.
The criteria will be as follows:
- Length. Is it long enough to entertain children for an acceptable amount of time? Minimum: fold one load of laundry. Better: glass of wine whilst checking Facebook. Best: Glass of wine and a bubble bath
- Content. Will it scare the crap out of my kids? At this point they are 2 and 3 years old so it’s mostly only visual stuff that scares them.
- Music/dance involvement. Does it have a song that will have the kids singing along? My boys really love music and will often sing and dance along with the movie and then continue on their own later on.
- Parent watchability (A.K.A. Hair-pulling factor, or, HPF) Does it require liquor for me to watch more than once? If so, is it wine, cooler, or the hard stuff?
Today I will begin with my review of Disney’s Frozen, since it was just released on DVD and Blu-Ray this week I am very familiar with it!
- Length: B+ At just over 1-1/2 hours it’s nothing special for a cartoon but it will keep my kids enthralled for 75% of the whole movie. Whether that’s just because it’s still new or because of the actual story will become apparent as time goes by. I can actually finish a load of laundry or two, plus have a glass of wine and read a good portion of my book with very little disturbance from the short ones.
- Content: A The only scary part is when Elsa creates the snow monster to scare away her sister but it goes by pretty quickly and is interspersed with scenes that don’t have the monster in them so they don’t have a chance to get scared before the scene changes to something cuter (like Olaf)
- Music/Dance: A+ It won the Oscar for a reason. I had heard the song on the internet before seeing the movie but watching how that song fit into the story made the song 8,000 times better for me. The rest of the songs are pretty cheesy on their own but make sense in terms of what they do in the story. I have already ordered the soundtrack at the kids bequest and we spent most of the day on Friday trying to track down the piano music so we can play it ourselves at home.
- HPF: A+ At this point I want to watch the movie more often than the kids. I do not require any kind of liquid inducement to enjoy this film but that doesn’t stop me from grabbing a glass in celebration of it!
Overall score: A+
This one will be a staple in our house for years to come, that includes the movie, the music, and the Disney Infinity figures