When most people hear the term “bliss” they think of warm white sand, the soft lapping of salty waves, the all-encompassing warmth of a tropical sun and the icy coolness of a fruity daiquiri. At least, that’s what I used to think bliss was. It still sounds pretty darn nice but since I became a mother I’ve had to relax my definition of “bliss” just a little bit.
For me it started while I was pregnant, bliss was when the day ended and I could finally lay back in my recliner with my poor, swollen feet up and my cold Slurpee (to combat heartburn of course!) beside me.
Once my Big Boy was born, bliss came anytime I was able to get him to fall asleep! I used to love just holding him and looking at every detail of his face while he was sleeping.
As he grew older and his brother joined him, bliss became any moment when they were both sleeping at the same time (it was rare, but did happen!) and I could have some quiet time.
That quiet time bliss is still my utopia, but it’s getting more and more elusive. My day is full of requests for juice, trips to the potty or playground, rides on the tractor, kisses, snuggles and hugs. All of these demands on my time make me feel useful and appreciated but also frazzled! Sometimes (okay, all the time!) I just want to have a minute of peace. A minute to sit and process everything that has been going on around here, a minute to attempt to form a plan of attack to get through the coming challenges (first day of kindergarten!), a minute to remember how blissful I was during my first few months of motherhood.
Maybe by concentrating so hard on finding what I think of as my ultimate “bliss” I’ve been denying myself countless moments of true contentment. Just this morning Little Man woke up early, crawled up onto my tummy, snuggled in and said, “Mummy, I so happy!” As I lay there with his warm, sleepy arms wrapped around me, watching the sun just start to kiss the trees outside the window all I could think about was getting him out of bed before he woke everyone else up, and about how it was so early that I really didn’t feel like moving just yet! Looking back now I realize that I should have just stayed in the moment and appreciated that minute of peace that I was given. I wasn’t alone but that merely shows me that I need to adjust my idea of bliss.
It was blissful this morning to watch my boys play together in a world of their creation, fighting fires with their trains and crafting burning buildings out of Lego. (Can you tell that we recently saw the new Disney Planes movie?)
It was blissful the other day when the boys were helping all the menfolk out in the workshop and I was able to straighten up, vacuum and shower without interruption. (To be honest, I had so much time by myself that I was starting to wonder what I should do!)
It was blissful this evening to be able to prepare a complete meal in my new home (which lacks all major appliances) even if it was just microwave hot dogs and deep fryer fries. For the first time since I moved I didn’t have to leave my kitchen to create a meal that made me full. (The ice cream in the freezer finished it all off nicely!)
It will be blissful this evening when I tuck the boys into bed, (an easy task I’m sure as they’re currently running around the yard with water guns!) pour myself a glass of wine and sit down to an hour or so of channel surfing…or reading…or video games without the little helper continually shooting me in the back!